Day 33 - Random thoughts from Scotland

As we leave Scotland, I am reflecting on some of the tidbits I learned over the last few days.

How do you know if someone is a witch? If you suspect someone of being a witch, you tie a stone around them and throw them in the lake. If they do not surface, then they are not a witch. If they do break free and surface, then you are welcome to tie them to a stake and burn them as a witch.

The roads are very narrow and often very curvy. I noticed on our unexpected bus ride to Fort William, when two buses pass, it is like a scene from Harry Potter and the night bus. Both buses are going full speed, they see each other and immediately go into slow motion and squeeeeeze by. I swear our bus sucked in and got taller. And then, instantly we are going full speed again.

Gas (petrol) is £1.96 per liter. Don’t worry, I’ll do the math. There are 3.79 liters in a gallon. So, 1.96 x 3.79 is £7.43 per gallon. Currently, £1 is equivalent to $1.19. So, a gallon of gas costs $8.84.

When I think of Scotland, the first thing that comes to mind is, well currently St Andrews because this is THE OPEN week. But before, it was the Loch Ness monster. However, Nessie is so inconsequential here, she is barely mentioned and when she is, she is a joke. For example, here she is hocking souvenirs at Inverness.

But misconceptions are all around. Every time we mention we are from Texas, people take a step back and ask if we are packing. Seriously, that is the impression of Texas to the rest of the world.

Would the average person really understand what this sign means at a train station?

We heard the story of the term Shitfaced from a different tour guide. So, we now have confirmation that it is true.

One good thing is that the food ordered in a restaurant is always hot. It isn’t necessarily always good. But it is always hot and fresh from the kitchen.

Fries are called chips and chips are called crisps. Baked potatoes are called jacket potatoes.

The term for y’all is “youse” as in “we have a table for youse here by the window.” Anything you ask for is met with, “Ya sure, we can do that.” It doesn’t always happen, but there is always hope.

Everyone is so polite: I bumped into a man and he turned and said, “Pardon, Love.”

In the states, we have Dollar Tree, Dollar General, Family Dollar, and Five Below. In the UK they have Pound Stretcher, Poundland, and One Beyond. Everyone is looking to save a dollar.

I learned about haggis years ago on ER (who says you don’t learn anything from TV) but I never thought people actually ate it. Haggis is a pudding containing sheep's pluck(?), minced with onion, oatmeal, suet(?), spices, and salt, mixed with stock, and cooked while encased in the animal's stomach. Yuck! But you know it is a thing when it is a flavor of potato chips.

I have heard the word “bespoke” more times in the past month than I have in my entire life. I admit I learned that word from How I Met Your Mother (again with the TV learning) when Barney was having a new suit tailored. Here it is used in everything from hotels, to spectacles, to tours. So, basically you can get anything you want, tailored to your every need.

And finally, the Duncans are officially from Scotland.